how lucky you were...

now i'm finally at it.
to work, to learn, to thrive, to exist.
all on my own.

its harder than i thought it was. exciting but thrilling at the same time. think of this... you are more than a thousand miles a way from home. you wake each day with no one to remind that you'll gonna be late. you look for food, and you realize that you have to cook it on your own. worst, you forgot to do the laundry. later, you do the grocery by yourself. you do the budget. you spend a portion on clothings and other luxuries-- all with deep regret. you see how fast your salary passes through your atm, through your palm. you are upset.

it then sinks in. you realize how lucky you were. that somebody used to wake you up in the morning. somebody used to cook food for you and even does laundry. somebody does your grocery. somebody buys you your clothes and luxuries. somebody provides your baon. and you even don't have to worry about money. lucky, indeed.

all worth the wait

more than 3 weeks ago, i was jobless.
and along with it--frustration.
i would often find myself crying and praying so hard.
God please provide me a job.

all the while i thought it was easy to find a job. well, maybe because my college professors say so--"after all you are a cpa, the job will find you." funny, i know. to whom much is given, much is expected in return.

the frustration is not so much about me wanting financial support for myself -as my folks would tell me always to take it slow and not to worry about money. neither is it about me longing for money to enjoy my luxuries. rather, the frustration stems from seeing yourself literally in bed whilst everyone else is having overtime workloads, browsing on their lap tops, walking in their business attires, tired and burned from work. jealousy, i suppose. ego.

i was the most excited to have a job. readied my attire already after the board, and shopped bit by bit to complete my business wardrobe. i guess, the overenthusiasm had much to do with the 3-month job vacancy period. i was picky with jobs. i was teased as having the most number of jobs applied-- from accounting to even far sales and marketing (it's true). but i enjoyed it, tiring though.

after some months, it then dawned to me: "joem, you still don't have a job!" shucks! worst, you would hear pity from others. or say someting that i should go home. or ask what's wrong with you? bad, very bad. even my parent's don't mind about me not having a job!!! why should others say that to me? why should they worry? why should they hurt me? absolutely, they have no right!

my ego is hurting, but i have to move. leave their worries behind me (after all, their worries are not mine). find more jobs and patiently wait. others may not seem to understand--the hell i care! as for me, i know that He instored greater things. to whatever road He is taking me, i shall want it.

now, i find myself in a cubicle, seated in a cozy office chair, in front of the computer, writing my blog while everyone is having merienda.
i have a work.
and i love it.
trust me, it is all worth the wait.
praise Him.

'aint no skeleton

today, i start my new blog.

too many stories to tell, too many views to share.

so i write.

of living.

of having your family.

of being in the company of friends.

of strangers you meet.

of work.

of love, probably.

read on.

chill.

and as i've promised...

there 'aint no skeleton.